Snowflake Embryo Grandbabies

This week I’m linking up with one of my favorite blogs, Kelly’s Korner.   Her “Show us Your Life” Friday feature is for grandmothers 🙂  It was almost exactly one year ago that I became the grandmother of twins -long awaited, much loved and prayed for, special little people.  For several years, my son and dear daughter in law tried on their own, and also through fertility treatments, to have a baby.  They were finally told that it would take IVF (in vitro fertilization) for their wish for a baby to come true.  Son and dear DIL prayed long and hard about what to do…. and then one day they learned about embryo adoption.  It was truly an answer to prayer.  This was perfect for them!  It was not only less expensive than IVF, it would possibly give a chance at life to a frozen embryo (which we personally believe to be a little person).  Families who do IVF, sometimes have left over frozen embryos that they do not want or cannot use themselves and they may  have an option to put their “left over” embryos up for adoption.  Our embryos came to us through a Christian embryo adoption agency.  It is much like adopting a baby… you have a caseworker, fill out lots of paperwork, pass thorough background checks, have a parenting plan, and then you get “matched” to a family.  To make a long story short, the first try at transferring the frozen embryos was unsuccessful.  A few months later, another attempt was made and this time, everything was just right.  We rejoiced to learn that dear DIL was indeed pregnant.  We rejoiced even more a few weeks later when we learned -via ultrasound- that twins were on the way!  Here are a few photos…

twins at 9 weeks!

Isn’t it amazing to see both our babies at only 7 weeks along?

Then we watched dear DIL “blossom” as well….

20 weeks 28 weeks 33 weeks

The pregnancy didn’t exactly sail along in smooth waters…  at 26 weeks, dear DIL had to be admitted to the hospital for pre term labor.  She spent approx 6 weeks in the hospital on strict bed rest and then two weeks at home – also on strict bed rest.  Then…. when she was 33 weeks and 2 days, her water broke.  We knew the babies were coming early, but we were also so thankful that she had been able to keep them safely inside for 33+ weeks.  Let me insert here that I’ve been a neonatal nurse for over 30 years, and in my heart I knew that there could be ALL SORTS of complications  with babies born even 7 weeks early.  Thankfully, the twins had a typical and normal course in the NICU.

Jake and Katie 6 days old

Here they are, Jake and Katelyn, 6 days old.  They were both around 4 pounds and 6 ounces at birth, Jake being a few ounces bigger than his sister.   You can see they have feeding tubes in.  Premature babies need to mature before they can take all their feeds on their own, so this is very typical.

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Here they are, sleeping in their isolettes.

first week at home 022After about 3 weeks, we had our precious twins at home.  Grammie Suz went to spend a couple weeks with the new family – precious days that will never be forgotten.  Our babies thrived and grew and grew!  Even though they were preemies, they learned quickly how much they loved to nurse.  No, I won’t be posting a photo of that!  But it was impressive, how quickly they caught on and went from all bottles (and dear DIL so busy, pumping, pumping, pumping) to simply nursing and loving it.

2012-07-11_08-27-30_319Here they are at about 3 1/2 months old… growing and getting cuter by the day!

grammie and katelyn jake and grammieThen one day last summer, the twins (and their parents) came to Grammies house to visit.  What fun!!

Twins 8 moHere our happy babies are at about 8 months.  Absolutely precious!

Katelyn Jan 16Here she is, a couple of months ago, so proud of her new found skill – standing!!

jake standing1Here is our big boy, standing up and very pleased with himself!

In about two weeks, we’ll celebrate their 1st birthday.  On that day we’ll send up special prayers to thank God for bringing these special, darling, and oh-so-loved babies into our lives.  🙂  I can’t say enough wonderful things about embryo adoption.  What a wonderful answer to many prayers!

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Sing You Home by Jodi Picoult

I normally don’t read controversial books.  Hey, everybody knows by now that I like historical novels… great stories based on fact – from times in our past, particularly eras in which I was not alive.  So, it’s a little surprising that I chose to read another of Jodi Picoult’s books- her most recent entitled “Sing You Home”.  It tackled some pretty hot topics…. Gay rights.  Embryo adoption.  Maybe this book grabbed me because I have close family members who are currently very involved in embryo adoption.  Maybe I was just ready to try another of Ms Picoult’s novels.  To be perfectly honest, I’ve never really read one of her books.  I have listened to them on CD and have to say that they are some of the best narrations I’ve heard.  This book was no exception – in the narration department.  The voices that portrayed the main characters of Zoe, Max, & Vanessa were impeccable.  Zoe was a “music therapist” (I’ve never heard of one before) and this recording – all 14 CD’s – had music interspersed.  I’ll be upfront here.  I don’t listen to books to hear music.   When I want to listen to music, I listen to music.    What I’m saying I guess is that the funky, cheesy “songs” that accompanied the reading of the book added nothing to the story and other than about 15 seconds of each one, I skipped over them.

I have a pretty open mind.  I’ve seen a LOT since I started working in a big-city hospital several years ago.  I’ve seen many different definitions of the word, “family”.  I’ve seen 50+ year old women giving birth to twins via invitro fertilization – and egg donation – and sperm donation (why, WHY, WHY would one go to such lengths at that age to have more children?? Yes, these were not her first).  I’ve seen single homeless women who’ve given birth to natural triplets.  I’ve seen twenty-somethings who are super proud of the new baby they’ve given birth to while hubby is away in the service of our country…. So proud that they bring to the hospital their present “boyfriend” as well as “the father of the baby” (two different guys)… neither of which happened to be the husband who was like I said – away serving our country in the armed forces.  We’ve had plenty of babies with two moms, babies born to drug addicts, and babies born to “regular” families.  I think my perspective has broadened and the main thing is that I want the kids to be brought up in loving homes.  However, call me super old fashioned if you’d like, but ideally I still believe that the best environment for a child (key word: best) is to be with a mom and a dad who love each other.  Frankly, there are fewer and fewer homes like this these days.  Soooooooooooooooo….. back to the book……………

The main character, Zoe, had infertility issues.  She and Max were married and tried IVF to conceive a baby.  She miscarried (several times).  She and Max get ultra-stressed out over the whole thing and end up getting a divorce after 9 years of marriage.  Zoe is devastated by the divorce, the miscarriage, her subsequent hysterectomy, and ends up falling in love with a woman, Vanessa.  They get married.  Max is an alcoholic who spirals out of control and ends up living with his older brother and his wife.  They are members of a church which is portrayed in the book as a bunch of crazy Christian nut jobs.  This is my biggest criticism of this book.  I know there are some nutty churches out there (like the Westboro Baptist “Church” who are a tiny congregation of crazy activists and DO NOT represent the Christian faith IN THE LEAST).  What ticked me off is that the author doesn’t define this church as radical in any way, and allows the reader to assume this is simply how “Christians” behave.  As a Christian myself, I know this is not true.

Zoe and Max have three frozen embryos and, funny thing – they were not addressed in the divorce papers. After three months of marriage to Vanessa, Zoe decides she wants the embryos for Vanessa to gestate. She approaches Max for his consent and he decides that he wants the babies to have a chance at life with his “good Christian” brother and wife who are themselves infertile.  Hence the lawsuit begins.

This book was actually quite well written, and addressed so many subjects that are sensitive.  I won’t give away the ending here, you’ll have to read the book to find out what happens.  Several times I was so angry at the way Christianity was portrayed, that I nearly stopped reading it.  Yet I hung in there and all I’ll say is that I wasn’t totally offended and up in arms about the ending.  It sure kept my attention over the 14 sound discs – and that’s saying something.  I’m pretty sure that this won’t be my last Jodi Picoult novel…. But I think I’m done with seriously controversial material for a while anyway.  My blood pressure can’t take it!!